Monday, March 23, 2009

Journeys we must travel....

People always say "Life's a journey" and other things that make no sense to me. My thought is that life is a series of journeys and it isn't necessarily where you go so much as how you get there. I know, nothing real earth shattering in my bit of logic but... it is an issue I regularly have to work on. My attitude while on said journeys tends to derail my train so to speak.

Many of you know that Todd and I have not been able to have kids. We both believe that we will have children of our own but so far it hasn't happened for us. This is a journey I would rather not have to take. I constantly have to work on my attitude, doubt is always there waiting to attack. I have to make sure to put on my spiritual armor every morning or my day is filled with doubt, disbelief, anger, frustration, and all sorts of other stuff. I don't do baby showers unless I am especially close to the mom-to-be, it just hurts too bad.

All of that to say, as much as I would rather not have to deal with this stuff, God has always been faithful. I have learned more on this journey than I ever could have without going on it. I can relate to other women dealing with infertility in a way that a mother can not. I know that I will be a mother someday not everyone has that assurance or hope. I don't know why God has asked us to go on this journey but here we are and my job is to obey and to do it with a good attitude. Tomorrow, my journey may be different and I hope that I can take what I have learned and apply it to the next journey. That after all is what life is all about.

1 comment:

  1. Great insight, Nikki. I remember feeling like this when everybody was getting married/got married/began to have babies and it was looking like I should probably just adopt a dozen more cats and begin to knit ugly afghans. :) Some parts of life are a hard "journey" but there is blessing on the way.

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